The incredible success of the Lena Dunham creation “GIRLS” cannot be denied. It’s loved,hated and lampooned and though it may not be for everyone, people are talking, and using words like “Brilliant”, “Breakthrough”, and “Suuriuslyee…” .
There’s a lot of money to be made in making shows tailored to the twenty-something self important, nothing-is-ever-good-enough crowd. You needn’t look any further than a farmers market to see that the audience this show is attracting is willing to fork out gratuitous amounts of cash for just about anything. Three Dollars for a bunch of Kale? Are you kidding me?
So vast is the success of the show that HBO execs are now scrambling to up the ante and sources that I just made up just now say they’ve immediately ordered spin-offs for the hit show. Here are a few of the possible contenders:
1. Cookin’ with Shosh - Each episode begins with perennial manic Shoshanna telling you all about her dreams, aspirations and things she noticed on the way to taping and a retelling of all of her favorite TV shows from the last week. She then plans out a six course meal and shows you how to cook it in the fastest easiest way possible, all the while explaining the process and what she thinks about it. This takes five minutes. The rest of each episode is her sitting on her bed hugging a feather & sequined pillow and listening to Beyonce songs and staring at her ceiling, saying “YES! YOU GO GIRL!”
2. Hannah and her Titshirts - It’s literally just a half hour of Lena Dunhams Boobs. Instagram shots, Short videos and slow motion bouncy, grainy films of the it-girls tits, all set to a soundtrack of ironic pop ballads, Arcade Fire, Toro Y Moi, Wilco and for some reason, a bunch of Manfred Mann.
3. werd: Hangin’ with a Black Dude - In response to the accusations that there were literally no black people on the show, Lena did the right thing…introduced a black character played by super hood ass Donald Glover (we presume Wayne Brady was unavailable) made him republican and got rid of him in two episodes. Diversity! In order to further make their point, Judd Apatow and Ms. Dunham have crafted a show that feels loose and comfortable. One part talk show, one part Racist stereotype, each episode pairs one hipster darling with a black dude for a one on one interview, unscripted interaction that feels genuine in the same way a man saying he likes Quinoa feels. The set is designed to look like a movie theater, with the co-hosts in a middle row and the audience all around them, facing a screen playing a loop of GIRLS episodes.
4. Whatever! Starring Marnie - Follow Marnie around the city as she takes in the local flavors and just judges the fuck out of people. A bit like Anthony Bourdaine but with a bitchy spoiled brat and NEVER EVER EATING. Regular features include: “Are you kidding me with that hat?” “Umm, okay, you go ahead and do that, then…” and the upclose and personal segment where we get to know Marnie and her guests better, “Here’s what’s wrong with you and how it negatively effects me in like, a major way”.
Of course, if you want to get more of the good stuff GIRLS has to offer, you need not wait, just go to a formerly sketchy area of any larger city, look for signs that say grass-fed, organic, or any shop name that ends in a period for no reason and you’ll see the true inspiration for this addictive serial: the most terrible people of the most recently grown up generation. Fer Shure.